Cromer with the crankies.

Hi guys',

Now I want you all to picture this........


It's one o'clock in the morning and the whole campsite's been in bed since ten. It's very dark and deathly quiet and we're tip toeing along a gravel road, in flip flops, as quietly as we can.  It doesn't help the fact that we've had a couple or so glasses of cider and my best mate is wearing a leopard skin Bet Lynch dressing gown to boot.


Well, needless to say, we were far from quiet. I can hear you all asking what we were doing. We can't have been coming back from the pub, not with Deb in her Bet Lynch dressing gown. I suppose the best place to start would be the beginning.


Deb and me have been best buddies for thirty odd years now and we both decided we were going to have a camping experience, on our tod, no men, just us, so we'd both have to muck in. You could say Deb and me are a bit like two peas out of the same pod, a very odd pod, but never the less, we do like the same things. Now I forgot that three trips already makes me a seasoned camper, so to speak. I had a feeling this was gonna be a strange three days.


There's one strict rule in the van, NO SOLIDS in the loo. I did however mention though, that if it was an emergency, the person who dealt it had to deal with it, so to speak. Well, when Deb actually saw what that would entail, she decided she wouldn't be doing any of that. Hence the one o'clock run. Now I don't remember promising to walk across to the toilet block at whatever ungodly hour it was, at all, but Deb insists I did. Needless to say, there were many more trips to the loo.


She was more than happy to muck in and fill the water tanks and I must admit she was a good reversing director. But could I get her out of her jeans, could I heck. The weather was lovely, a bit cool, but lovely. The sun was shining and in the sun it was hot.


'Come on Deb, get your cut offs on and we'll go for a walk on the beach'



That wasn't going to happen. Oh well, there's always tomorrow. We had a lovely walk, along the cliffs to West Runton then down onto the beach to East Runton, where we'd be able to get back up to the road toreturn to the campsite. About three miles in all, it was lovely.

This is the lifeboat station, with Deb having a quick breather before we traverse the HUGE hill, to get into East Runton.

I love the Norfolk coast, the beaches are lovely and clean and they're all dog friendly. This is the view from East Runton, pointing towards Cromer. You can just see the pier in the distance, that was to be our destination tomorrow. No buses for us.


We had a lovely evening. After our late tea we got snuggled up in our jim jams and settled down to watch a movie. We were going to watch 'The girl with the dragon tattoo' trilogy. One for each night.  I think we got to sleep about two in the morning and Deb was up with the larks at six. OMG. I knew she doesn't sleep much, but four hours!!!!


Next day she decided she wasn't going to be a chicken and actually put on her cut offs. I couldn't resist a photo of her. I think it was the stripey socks with the flowery ballet pumps that did it. 

Bless!!!!!!   ;)


I wasn't going anywhere with her looking like that, so I relented and on went the jeans again. I wonder if she did it on purpose?


It was a great walk, very bracing. It was a bit windier today, but me being seasoned now, ahem, I'd still worn my cut offs. I was to regret that later. We took a few pickies and chatted to people who were walking along the beach with their dogs. I even bent down to stroke a cute little thing and got bitten on the nose for my trouble. Honest. It didn't mean to, as I went down, it came up and its teeth connected with my nose. It could only happen to me.

 We got to Cromer about lunch time, it was a nice walk, about two miles. We were either going to be fitter when we got home, or buggered. On four hours sleep, I knew what I was going to be. So we had a good look around the town, a bit of lunch and a beer on the pier and then decided to head back about three. The weather was changing and we were determined we were going to walk.

By the time we got down onto the beach to head back to East Runton, the wind had really got up. We were walking into a head wind and the sand was being whipped up along the beach, right into our faces. My legs felt as though they were being sandblasted. That'll teach me, eh. Deb was a bit smug at this point.

We got back to the van about six and were absolutley knacked. We felt like we'd walked ten miles, not the five we actually had. We felt invigorated though, nacked, but invigorated. Needless to say, we didn't do much that night. We ached all over and my legs were raw.

We decided not to much the next day, quite honestly we were both too exhausted. So we sat by the van with our kindles ( and a few glasses of pink cider, yum yum ) and had a nice relaxing day. We were going into East Runton for the curry night at the local pub later, so we were quite happy to doss.

Well we had a fab three days. Deb is now a seasoned camper and can't wait to go again. As for me, I go again next week with my two grandsons. They'll love it there, loads of rock pools for them to explore in. Hope it's not too cold. Think perhaps the xbox will have to accompany us for that trip.

Thanks for popping by, hope you're enjoying my camper capers and do come again.


Cheers,

Jools.  xxx

Damage Barton, Devon, episode three....

Hi de hi campers,


Thought I'd better put you all out of your misery and finish the tale. Not only that, I'm away again on Tuesday. Me and my daughter are going off with my two grandsons for a couple of days, so goodness knows what might happen. Tracy said we can get there for twelve and pop the awning up, then we'll have the rest of the afternoon. HA. I asked her if she'd read my blog.

So where was I? Oh yes, sat on the edge of the bed feeling thoroughly miserable and wanting to go home. I had a fitful nights sleep, little wonder really, and was wondering how I was going to face my knight in shining armour.

What a lovely surprise when we woke up next morning. The wind had dropped and there wasn't a cloud in the sky. Lovely. Someone must have taken pity on us. The view from outside the van was spectacular.

Time to get horizontal in the sun, but first I needed to face someone. I could see the little golf type gardening  buggy, parked outside the shower block, so off I went. He was with his wife and they both had the biggest grins on their faces as I approached. I apologised once more and thanked him profusely for coming to our aid, then he showed me his arm. OMG.  It was covered, from wrist to shoulder, in bright red welts and scratches. I was mortified. They were both very sweet about everything and it actually broke the ice, we were all best of buddies for the rest of the holiday. They'll certainly not forget us in a hurry.

So, by the van, with kindle in hand, I settled for a stress free day in the sun. Well I was reading a certain book that everybody is going mad about. Yes, you've got it. Fifty shades of RUDE!!!.  Well I was so disgusted with it, ( ahem)  I just had to carry on reading. It was my duty, my Mary Whitehouse bit. Well you know what they say about mad dogs and English men, don't you?  Well, I lost track of time and consequently...........

What a plonka, didn't even think to kick my shoes off.  Bright red legs, snow white feey. Oooooo, they were sore later that night, as were my shoulders, my chest, my NOSE. Ouch.

The rest of our stay in Devon was ( sorry to disappoint you all ) beautiful.  There were some lovely walks, so I bought a couple of walking poles and off we went. I'd already been off on my own once, to test the water, so to speak. That's why I decided on the poles, easier to cross becks and things, which nobody told us about.  It was about two miles to Morthoe, the next village along the coast and it was a lovely scenic route.



This is the main path leading down to the campsite farm. We turned left here and hopped over our first stile.

A bit further on and we could still see the Bristol Channel. When you count how many field are between us and the cliff edge it makes you realise how far away we were. It didn't feel like that on our first night though.

These next pictures are of Woolacombe, the next town along the coast from Morthoe. We caught the bus to go here. It's about four miles, that would have meant two miles to Morthoe, across the fields, then two more to Woolacombe. Nah.......


The thing that amazed me most were the buses. I worried about driving my camper down these little roads and up the huge, cliff like hills. Some of the buses were doubledeckers. We caught one back to the site. I thought we were all going to have to get off at one stage, it was going so slow. Honest, I was surprised it made it up one hill, we could hear the engine struggling. Bet they go through a few gear boxes down there.

This is the view looking up from the sea front, proper chocolate box houses aren't they? Look at the hills, no wonder Sue struggled for most of them. Can you imaging having to put that scaffolding up. My nephew's a scaffolder, I'll have to ask him.

And here we have 'Woolacombe Sands', which is reputedly the longest and best beach on the North Devon coast. It's quite a popular tourist attraction, ideal for surfing. There were loads of  surfing  dudes, as my sis kept referring to them?!? dreads and all.  Lovely for the kids too, safe and very clean. You don't lose the ruggedness of the coastline though, I just turned a few more degrees and this was the view.

We were even treated to some lovely Devon sunsets too,  I love sunsets. These were both taken from outside the van, different night of course, but no holiday snaps are complete without a few sunsets, what say you? How many sunset snaps do you have? :)

Absolutely breathtaking, the photographer was a bit rubbish though, didn't do them justice. ( I wonder who took them? )

So, several Devon cream teas and a couple or so of PROPER Cornish pasties later, it was time to pack up the awning and go home. Boo hoo. We both thoroughly enjoyed the rest of the holiday, in fact, I would have been quite happy to stay a while longer. Now we had sun I wanted more, I was being greedy. Alas.......

So that's about it guys'. Have all the disasters put me off camping? No way. I LOVE, LOVE, LOVE it. What have I learned? That these things happen when you're camping. All part of campings rich tapestry.  (  oh please......)


Thanks for coming by and sticking it out until the end. Hope you enjoyed my capers and do come again to see what I get up to next. Who knows. 


TTFN.



Jools.   xxxx

Damage Barton, Devon, episode two.......

So, where was I?

Oh yes, being rocked to sleep by gale force winds, on top of a cliff, in a metal box. I think that just about sums it up.

I was the first to wake next morning and full of expectant hope, I jumped out of bed and opened the front curtains to see the view. Still no panaramic view. Buggar this for a game of soldiers. Come on Sue, we're catching the bus to Ilfracombe.

We stood out on the road, in the fog, hoping the bus would be able to see us in enough time to stop. We heard it before we saw it and gingerly edged forward to wave it down. The people who lived in that area must be used to the extreme weather, they didn't seem to bat an eyelid. We got on the bus and told the driver where we wished to go.

"Is the weather a bit better in Ilfracombe?" I asked, with more than a hint of hope in my voice.

"The weather's the same as here, but at least you won't be sat in the clouds." I'm sure I saw the bus driver's lips twitch, trying to stifle a grin.

Well, the bus went down and down and down and down. My ears were popping and much to our delight, there was scenery.

Ilfracombe is a tiny fishing village with a quay and marina. It was quite quaint actually, but VERY HILLY. The houses were all built into the hillside and it was really lovely, even though it was bleak and windy.

We had a good walk around the quay and marina and then ventured into the main town. We were looking for a craft shop, no, not for me. Sue had brought odd needles with her and if she couldn't knit......... Anyway, we asked for directions and headed up this 1:4 hill to get to it. Poor old Sue has a bad back and found it a bit of a struggle, but her tenacity kicked in, she needed her needles. We got to the shop at about five past one, it closed at one and didn't open again until two-thirty. Neither of us said a word, our mood was so low we were past moaning.

Back down the hill to the quayside it was and to console ourselves we had a traditional Cornish pasty, comfort food. Lovely.  Two thirty, off we went again, up the hill. Yeh, the shop's open. I got there before Sue, so I went into the shop and asked for no5 needles.

"Sorry," said the young lady, "we don't sell knitting needles."  I didn't swear, honest.

"Do you know where we can get some please?"

She gave us directions and off we went, down the bloody hill again. We seemed to be walking around for ages  looking for this shop, when I spotted a craft exhibition. I went in to ask directions and the man in there asked how fit we were, he could send us the short hard way, or the long easy way. I looked round at Sue and asked for the long, easy way.

We found it eventually and Sue got her needles and some wool. She's worse than me with my craft stuff, well nearly. The rest of the day wasn't too bad, it rained a few times early on, but later in the afternoon this bright orange thing appeared in the sky and we actually took our coats off.

The sea was a bit choppy though and some folk had actually ventured down onto the beach. Mad fools. By about four, we were getting ready to go back to the van. We were going to have a barby that night, if the clouds had lifted, so off we went, looking for the bus station. We knew where it was, it was at the bottom of that hill we had become so well acquainted with. :)

When we got back to the camp site it was lovely and clear, still windy and cloudy, but we could see. I got quite excited, I was going to get to try out my new bucket barby, a bright orange one. I got cracking with the barby and Sue got the potatoes and salad done. It was 5-30pm.

By 7-30 we were still waiting for the sausages to cook, I think the wind was cooling the sausages before the heat could cook them. We got our food eventually and had a nice restful evening. Sue was happy, she could do her knitting. We were feeling quite upbeat by now, the weather was supposed to be changing tomorrow and perhaps our holiday could start.

I made the rule that the van was a no smoking area, I know I know, why are we smoking? LOOK, it'd been a stressful 3 days. God, was that all it had been, 3 days? Anyway, we could have a wind free smoke in the awning, we just pushed the van door too, so the smoke didn't go in. We were all ready for bed and hoping for a better nights sleep, seeing as the wind had dropped a bit. Only 20miles an hour now. We went out into the awning and wound up the camping lantern, yes, wind up and had a last ciggie of the night.

Sue went to get back into the van and looked round at me with a look of sheer panic on her face.

" The door won't open."

I got up and tried it too, she was right, it had locked?!?!   Shit shit shit. Now what? She saw one of the ladies from the neighbouring van coming back from the loo, so she went out to grab her. My mind was working overtime. I tried the cab doors, LOCKED. The lady asked where the keys were.

"On the hook inside the door."

"Do you have spares?"

"Yes, in my handbag."

"Where's your handbag?"

" In the van." Like I'd bring my bag out into the awning evertime I came out!

By this time her hubby had arrived and the three of them were stood rubbing their heads. The lady informed us that there wasn't a resident warden on the site, but I wasn't convinced. I remembered that there was a caravan near the shower block that was fenced off. The campsite was pitch black at night, so I grabbed my wind up lantern and headed for the shower block. Sure enough, there was the fenced off caravan. I touched the gate to open it and a dog started barking a BIG dog. Well, if there was anybody in there, that would wake them, so I waited, for what seemed like an eternity.

A very sleepy, half clad man came to the door and gave me a thunderous look. Shit. It was 11-30. I explained what had happened and he said he'd come to the van.

" You're on C7 aren't you?"  How did he know that? Wonder if he'd been watching me putting the awning up?

 I made my way back to the van and a few minutes later he turned up with a couple of wire coat hangers. He tried, in vain, to pop the latch up in the cab door.

"Is there a window open?"

"No."

"A skylight?"

"No." I felt like screaming the fact at him, that it had been blowing a gale for 3 days, but decided against it.

"Where are the keys?"

"On the hook inside the door."

"Do you have spares?"

"Yes, in my handbag."

"Where's your handbag?"

" In the van."  I had a feeling of  deja vu at that point.

He decided to try and get in through the skylight and proceeded to climb the ladder onto the roof. The only problem was, the awning flap was over the skylight and it was fastened firmly down with two guy ropes. Remember the awning? So the other man released the guy ropes and it sort of groaned and lurched forward. I just prayed it wouldn't fall over.

He fiddled and wiggled and eventually the skylight popped up. We watched as the wire came through the skylight towards the keys. Hope he's good at fishing. He managed to hook them on the end and with one deft move, grabbed them with his free hand, before they could fall on the floor. He threw them down to me and I unlocked the door. The relief was palpable. I wanted to give him something for his trouble but hadn't a clue how much, so I grabbed a £20 note from my purse and headed to the back of the van just as he was coming down the ladder. I pressed it into his hand and thanked him profusely. I didn't know what else to do, I felt like hugging him, but decided that would be inappropriate, besides, he didn't look very happy!!!!!

Our neighbours disappeared, as did our knight in shining armour and we both went inside and sat on our beds and just looked at each other. 


" I want to go home............."



Thanks for coming by, hope you're enjoying my calamitous  camper capers and do come back for episode three.... Will it be the last one or is there still so much more to tell?



bye for now.........


Jools.  xxx